Why Are Adolescents So Difficult?

Surveys today reveal that adults generally find adolescents perplexing, hard to deal with and lacking in respect for adult and parental values.

“The young always have the same problem - how to rebel and conform at the same time.  They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another.”  ~Quentin Crisp, 1962

Over 70% of adolescents prefer to spend time with friends over parents and family – in fact, family comes in at #4 behind: friends at #1, flirting at #2 and music at #3.

“It's difficult to decide whether growing pains are something teenagers have - or are.”  ~Author Unknown

But has much changed? Adults seem to have always had problems with adolescents.

“The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.”

Guess who wrote this? Socrates, around 419 BC.

“Adolescence is perhaps nature's way of preparing parents to welcome the empty nest.”  ~Karen Savage and Patricia Adams

There is a very good reason that adolescents are “difficult” – they are trying to find out who they are and where their future will be.

“Mother Nature is providential.  She gives us twelve years to develop a love for our children before turning them into teenagers.”  ~William Galvin

There are dramatic changes to their body, their thought patterns, their brain development and then questions about sexuality, purpose and their ability to understand what is happening to them.

In adolescence such problems as schizophrenia, eating disorders and depression arise.

The emotional insecurity among some adolescents may also tend to cause instances of crime among youth. It is often seen that searching for a distinctive identity is one of the problems that adolescents face.


During adolescence many experiment with alcohol and even drugs.

It is also common for individuals to express their desire to be more like their role models such as athletes, rock or pop stars, and film and television performers.1

“Few things are more satisfying than seeing your children have teenagers of their own.”  ~Doug Larson


Relationships with friends are vital.

Relationship with peers plays an important role in analyzing adolescent psychology. It is seen that 90% of adolescents associate themselves with a peer group. 

Adolescents receiving support from their peers are less probable to fall into depression or face anxiety.

It is also seen that depressed individuals find it difficult to make friends. 

The nature of an adolescent’s behavior is greatly influenced by his friends and companions. 

Adolescent psychology has gained prime importance in the recent past due to increased cases being reported about adolescent depression and anxiety.1

“When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.  But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.”  ~Mark Twain


1 Peter Emerson